The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
Randomize
