It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
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Did you just see the Batmobile???
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
The upside of Thirsty Thursdaying with the client last night was that he was so hungover that he didn't want to spend time wrangling over the contract extension this morning.
Boss just said I'm getting a bonus for this. Want to celebrate our anniversary a week early tonight?
This is why I married you.
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
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