No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
Randomize
