Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
Randomize
