Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
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