i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
Farmville is her only friend.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
Come over. I'll eat you out and we'll make bacon.
best text I've received ever.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
Randomize
