She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
Can someone please explain where the fish in the mason jar came from when we were at a bar all night?
You told the bartender if he gave you one of the fish you'd go away
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
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