Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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