No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
Randomize
