i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
Randomize
