Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
My favorite part of you downing a fifth of fireball in my apartment by yourself is the shot glass in the sink. It's like you attempted moderation and were just like "Fuck this."
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
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