apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
Randomize
