my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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