I just saw a hot homeless man
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
i woke up with a grocery list signed by "the people who ate all your shit while you were passed out"
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
Randomize
