If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
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