Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
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