found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
OPIZZABONMYDICK
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
Randomize
