I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
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