I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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