Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
I am coming home with the worst sun burn of my life, two unused condoms, and an unworn slutty dress. Worst. Bachelorette. Party. Ever.
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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