So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
Randomize
