i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Randomize
