so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
I hate about 85% of people that I meet. I'm an awful person. In reality my only redeeming qualities are my face, my amazing scissoring skills and the fact that children love me.
True on all accounts.
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
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