He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
So I'm driving and this guy next to me at the stop light is reving his engine and honking at me. Motherfucker thinks that's because I'm asian and drive a honda I'm automatically going to race him
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
