It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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