How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
Randomize
