I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.