It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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