that's an acceptable place to lick
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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