No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
