In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Thanks for telling my landlord that the poop stain was yours and not my secret dog.
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
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