On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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