I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
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