Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
Cause I came home. Im covered in green marker and jack daniels. Theres a taco and the words "we went to Mexico" on my wrist. Im a walking abomination.
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
Randomize
