don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So gin and wine won't be happening again
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
Randomize