I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
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