covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
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