Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
Randomize
