Welp...herpes.
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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