Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
I booty called her while she was in labor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can someone please explain where the fish in the mason jar came from when we were at a bar all night?
You told the bartender if he gave you one of the fish you'd go away
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
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