this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize
