Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
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