he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
Randomize
