Just brushed my teeth...forgot we used this toothbrush in bed last night.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
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