help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
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