Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Heybabeimwearingurpanties
would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
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