two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
Randomize