im typing and i feel like my hands are on backwards.
Stop texting me, I'm right here.
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
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