How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize
