I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
Oh god it's open bar.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
Randomize
