If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
He chugged from a bottle of wine and then we had pretend sex
How do you have pretend sex?
It was bad...so it was pretend
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
Randomize
